Chasing Liberty

How often have you had this feeling of not feeling "your own person"?  It's like you have lived your whole life for others, and never really felt worthy.

As fate would have had it…this question began bothering me as I embarked on the “I’m gonna be fine!” mission almost a year back.

I scuffled between vodka shots, long calls with friends, sessions with a shrink, retail therapy, self help books, moments of acute depression, and adrenaline rushes. And all of it got monotonous and endless until one ordinary day realization dawned upon me that time is running out and I should live my life as the sands of time may never come back. And yes, all those activities everyday pushed me closer to this realization.

Last year, around the same time, everything seemed bizarre and disparity set in. But today, the sun has come up and reality has set in, and after a long slumber I feel undeniably awake and alive.

My little sister (Baby S) realized that it was high time I deserved a pat on the back and she chose to celebrate this change in me. She called it my ‘Independence Day’ and threw me a surprise celebration party last Saturday packed with mirth and laughter. It is she who I love to pamper, but this time I was at the receiving end.

And whoa! I was spoilt bad…molten chocolate cake, Spa vouchers, balloons, dim lights, Chinese food, and acoustic guitar. My best buds also threw in a surprise movie and brunch outing.

It was a fulfilling and happy day, and honestly, this change is for the good. And, this sense of freedom is absolutely refreshing.

Thanks Baby S, Dhaasu & Donna for making my chase to liberty an epic one. And thanks Indro for all the ‘new age’ and ‘bapok’ elements.